So you’re headed to your all-inclusive club and you’re thinking that there’s not a whole lot that is terribly necessary for you to have in your bag. Most of everything you’ll need is included. Food. Booze. I guess that’s it. Well there is one thing that will make you pretty pissed off if you don’t have it.
A cup. A big one. Why the hell would you need a cup? It’s all-inclusive resort. It’s not like they’re gonna be pouring booze into your hands. Or spitting it into your mouth like a momma bird feeding her babies (file under future business ideas. Health department issues? Will drinking booze from bartenders’ mouth cause a bar to get a “B” rating from the health department or lower. Research this). All-inclusive resorts must have cups, right?
Well, of course. But the cups are tiny. And translucent. Meaning slower booze consumption and drinks that get warm quickly. Eventually you will want a big cup. Others will have them (because they followed my wise words). But you should be a leader in this matter, not a follower. If you show up with your cup after everyone else, you will be called a copycat. And you can’t have that.
Your gift shop will probably have cups for sale, but you will get slammed. USD18 for my cup. Dang. And maybe, you, like me, aren’t a big fan of “I been there” type souvenirs, so you don’t need a “Jamaica, no problem” cup or whatever the slogan is of the place you’re visiting. But you need a cup! No choice.
So, whether you bring your favorite cup from home or buy one at your local cupware emporium, you will be an automatic legend when you hit the swim up bar. And isn’t that what we all want to be? A swim-up bar legend?
You could also use a Cambodian Rugby Mug but I don’t think it’s big enough.